
Etsy Witch
Published October 16, 2026
Etsy Witch refers to self-identified witches who sell curses, hexes, and spells through the online marketplace Etsy, often working around the platform's 2015 ban on magical services1. The label shifted into meme territory in September 2025 after Jezebel published an article about paying Etsy witches to curse right-wing commentator Charlie Kirk two days before Kirk was fatally shot at Utah Valley University2. Within hours of the shooting, X users were sharing the Jezebel link with reaction images, joking that the hexes had actually landed4.
Overview
Posts in this category typically combine a screenshot of the Jezebel article or an actual Etsy spell listing with a reaction image signaling shock, suspicion, or dark glee4. Humor runs on coincidence: a column published two days before Charlie Kirk was shot at Utah Valley University is reread as retroactive proof that the paid curses worked3. Captions often use a mock-sincere voice, with posters crediting unknown Etsy shop owners for an event known to have been carried out by a lone shooter4.
Behind the September 2025 joke sits a longer online subculture of paid witchcraft. The Verge reported in June 2015 that Etsy was emailing shop owners to suspend them for selling spells, hexes, potions, and crystals under a policy that forbade magical outcomes as a service while allowing tangible items1. Witches worked around the restriction by relabeling listings as readings or shipping a printout of the ritual, and witch-themed listings were still easy to find on Etsy as of Jezebel's reporting2. Writer Kylie Cheung singled out a 'Shit Your Pants Spell' and a 'MAKE EVERYONE HATE HIM' curse among the services she purchased for her Kirk experiment2.
Urban Dictionary later logged Etsy Witch as a euphemism for a political assassin, letting posters joke about violence by naming hexes instead6. Know Your Meme catalogued the format as both a joke template and a line of discourse about contract witchcraft5.
Gallery
Origin & Background
How It Spread
Timeline
2015-06-19
The Verge reports Etsy's ban on sale of spells, hexes, potions, and crystals; a petition against the ban gathers close to 4,000 signatures[1].
2025-09-08
Jezebel publishes 'We Paid Some Etsy Witches to Curse Charlie Kirk' by Kylie Cheung, detailing purchases including the 'Shit Your Pants Spell'[2].
2025-09-10
Charlie Kirk is fatally shot during a presentation at Utah Valley University; X users immediately resurface the Jezebel article as a joke[3].
2025-09-10
@lib_crusher posts a Brian Griffin shock reaction quote-tweet of the Jezebel article and gathers more than 55,000 likes within about two hours[4].
How to Use This Meme
Common posts take a screenshot of the Jezebel article or a specific Etsy spell listing and set it against a reaction image or quote-tweet styled as proof that the hexes worked4. Mock-sincere captions crediting unnamed witches are the dominant tone, often ending with a punchline naming the specific spell title that supposedly delivered the result2.
Frequently Asked Questions
References (6)
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